The Single Virtue That Leads To An Upright Character
Pride is the great obstacle in developing moral character, and thus by cause and effect, winning the respect and esteem of our fellow man.
It is the
great obstacle because it prevents us from recognizing and acknowledging our
current mistakes and faults, which tend to trigger others and turn them into
our antagonists, resulting in them often harboring ill will towards us and
likely withdrawing or withholding their cooperation.
If we fail
to recognize and acknowledge our mistakes and faults, we condemn ourselves to
never learning from our errors in thought, word and deed, such that we may
correct them, which only forces us to experience the same undesirable results
in our relations and affairs over and over again, leading to ongoing strife and
distress.
Humility is
the remedy to this great obstacle.
It empowers
us to look at ourselves, not as we may think or believe ourselves to be, but as
we actually are, objectively. And it is through this lens that we make
ourselves capable of correcting ourselves and our errors because we are now
aware of them, so that through this course of action we come to change the
results we get in our relations and affairs.
But if we
remain prideful, we set forth the sole condition that makes us susceptible to
others making known our mistakes and faults at any time, whereby we may
encounter embarrassment and disgrace. And it is in our response to such
accusations that we then tend to indignantly defend ourselves and the current
state of our moral character with denials, excuses, justifications and
scapegoats.
With pride
as our compass, when we are accused of something that we consider wrong or
offensive, we either:
1. Deny we
are guilty,
2. Excuse
our behavior,
3. Justify our
behavior by framing it in a constructive light, or
4. Blame
others or outside circumstances for having enacted it.
But this
instinctive response just signals to others that we lack responsibility, refuse
to hold ourselves accountable, and are ignorant to the true natures of our
current moral character when they know we are in the wrong, which usually
results in them losing respect for us.
To
circumvent these undesirable results, the person who would make themselves a
master of themselves, develops humility whereby they no longer get triggered
and go into these instinctive reactions whenever others accuse them of some
flaw or short-coming. Instead, they utilize their reason and ask themselves if
their critic is correct in their allegations based on one thing:
The Facts.
So the
person gets them.
Then, if
they find that the critic is in the right and that they is in the wrong, they
express gratitude for having uncovered yet another one of their faults, knowing
now that it has placed themselves into a position whereby they may correct
them, thus improving themselves, their relations and affairs as a direct
result, lending to more peace, joy and happiness in life.
And if the
person finds their critic is wrong, they simply smile, knowing full well that
their accuser lacks wisdom and sound judgment.
The person
who adopts this course of action soon works out their every fault, remolds
their moral character into iron, and makes themselves a greater power of
influence among their kinship.
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